Crossword 018: Spatial Relations

Sir Laurence Alma-Tadema, A Favourite Custom

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As every child knows, there were nine Muses:  Calliope, Clio, Euterpe, Erato, Melpomene, Polyhymnia, Terpsichore, Thalia, and Urania.  Erato is a crossword favorite, on account of her attractive vowels.  However, Wikipedia informs us that there were originally only three Muses, representing Practice, Memory,  and Song—and I have constructed this crossword with the purpose of giving some long-overdue attention to this neglected trio, especially its second member, featured in 54 Down, which is where I began work.  I really wanted to fit in the other two—Melete and Aoide—but my theme got in the way.

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018 Spatial Relations

Crossword 017: Social Media Uploads

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The above Victorian painting alludes to the Victorian worker of 36 Down.  The puzzle itself may seem uncharacteristically up-to-date, but don’t worry: the grasp of social media I display here is every bit as crude as the grasp of computer networking I displayed in last week’s puzzle.

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017 Social Media Uploads

Crossword 016: “I've Been Hacked!”

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I apologize in advance if 16 Across seems too risqué to some solvers.  Just imagine what I might have done with 27 Across, if I were not committed to the highest standards of decency.

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016 “I've Been Hacked!”

Crossword 015: Family Entertainment

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I have never been able to habituate myself to the simulated gore, on television and in the movies, for which the whole world seems to have such an insatiable appetite.  Severed limbs, gushing blood, exploding heads—I don’t see the appeal.  This crossword is my little act of protest.

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015 Family Entertainment

Crossword 014: Knife, Fork, and Spoonerisms

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The foodstuffs alluded to in this puzzle would not make for a particularly healthy or appetizing meal, but it might be better than the one in the picture above, which seems to consist of a salad, a roast with a chocolate doughnut (?) on top of it, and a giant slice of cake.  Appetizing or not, however, I like this picture—the huge fish painting at the left, the horses looking through the window, the dog statues on the hearth, and the wary reactions of the pretty woman and her guardian, seated on the right, to the blotchy-faced man who seems to be inviting himself to join them.

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014 Knife, Fork, and Spoonerisms

Crossword 013: F-ing L

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I recommend solving crossword puzzles as a pleasant alternative to thinking about the ultimate fate of self, earth, and universe.

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013 F-ing L

Crossword 012: Spice Rack

George William Joy, A Dinner of Herbs

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Six spices may not make for much of a rack, but at least you can find the one you’re looking for, assuming it’s one of those six.

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012 Spice Rack

Crossword 011: Oxymoronism

Henry Courtney Selous, The Love Letter

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Today’s painting illustrates the predicament described in the puzzle’s entry for 49 Across—if you interpret the girl’s expression as conveying a kind of numb incredulity.

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011 Oxymoronism

Crossword 010: Multiple Choice

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Who says mortal terror is not an appropriate theme for a light-hearted crossword puzzle? 

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010 Multiple Choice

Crossword 009: Making Mischief

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I admit it—I consulted a thesaurus.

If, like me, you dislike cross-referenced crossword clues, I will assume your gratitude for my resolutely unrelated clues to 12 Down and 56 Across.

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009 Making Mischief

Crossword 008: Self-Assertion

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Last week’s humility didn’t last.  But as crossword favorite Lao-Tse says somewhere (or was it Lao-Tzu?), true humility is proven by nothing so clearly as unmerited and unshakable self-regard. 

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008 Self-Assertion.puz

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008 Self-Assertion

Crossword 007: Self Effacement

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After last week’s self-indulgence I try here to show a little humility.

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007 Self-Effacement

Crossword 006: Oenology

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A common crossword genre is the hidden-word puzzle:  some word or set of related words is enclosed in common phrases,  “stale,” for example, in “first alert” (clue: “Smoke alarm brand”).  Fun stuff.  But I prefer to enclose words in startling new phrases created not to hide those words, but to tax my ingenuity for clues that make sense of them,  “amusing,” for example,  in “hippopotamus in-group” (clue: “Semi-aquatic jungle clique”).  It’s a matter of taste.  In this puzzle I may have gone too far, however.

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006 Oenology

Crossword 005: A Minus

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 Repetition is comforting. 

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005 A Minus

Crossword 004 Plutocratic Pastimes

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The  rule-bound, rigidly symmetrical crossword form cries out, I think, for utter nonsense.  This is a modest tribute  to the nonsense poems of  Edward Lear and Lewis Carroll.

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004 Plutocratic Pastimes

Crossword 003: Broken Ranks

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Only corporal punishment could improve this puzzle.

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003 Broken Ranks

Crossword 002: One for Two

Alfons Mucha, Dance (1898)

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This puzzle, though admittedly half-witted in its way, is also semi-autobiographical: it's the second I ever made.  The picture illustrates 9 Down.

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002 One for Two (online)

Crossword 001: "It's an Upset!"

William-Adolphe Bouguereau, Bacchante (see 67 Across)

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I post this puzzle, “It’s an Upset,” to celebrate the fact that my website is now “up.”  Fitting, isn’t it?  If you persevere in visiting my website, you will find that I am distinguished by nothing so much as my acute sense of the fitting—my command of nuance—my exquisite tact.  Tell your friends! 

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001 It's an Upset.puz

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001 It’s an Upset (online)