If this puzzle doesn't make you groan, you have simply lost the ability to groan. I ought to be sorry about it, but I'm not. Well, I'm a little sorry to have had to use an old ad slogan for 21-Across. But that's all. Otherwise, I'm proud of my work! I glory in it! I represent the avant-avant-garde of paronomasia. As Schoenberg was to Schubert, as Rothko was to Rembrandt, so am I to any old-fashioned punster who cares about such stodgy matters as actual homophonic similarity.