Here at David Alfred Bywaters’s Crossword Cavalcade and Fortnightly Victorian Novel Recommender we’ve been working on a number of crosswords solutions that will assist in a diverse array of government functions at the local, state, and federal levels. For example, the Department of Energy will be interested in our training package that provides workers of all kinds with crucial experience in the management of grids; local school districts will benefit from our vocabulary-builders, designed to help early learners distinguish between ouzo and orzo, the epee and the erne; while the Pentagon will want to purchase our suite of maximally baffling puzzles specifically designed to confuse and demoralize the nation’s enemies. Our first step, of course, will be to contribute generously to the campaign funds of politicians who are or will be in a position to purchase these products. If you are such a politician, don’t hesitate to reach out!
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